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| My List | Late Night's Final Selections (5/12/03) |
| 14. Every time I try to light the barbeque, he yells over the fence "Hey Jim, I'll do that!" | |
| 13. Always trying to get me to invest in adamantium futures | |
| 12. Every time he comes over, only wants to watch "Edward Scissorhands" | |
| 11. I know her hair is white, but she still looks like that fox from The Flintstones | |
| 10. Sign on his pickup says "Magneto's Lawnmower Repair and Iron-Based Alloy Manipulation" | 10. Text |
| 9. Hard to hold a conversation with the guy when his eyes are glowing red | 9. Text Name, City, State |
| 8. He's uncontrollable and unpredictable in battle and prone to occasional berserker rage . . . No wait, that's my other neighbor, Bobby Knight | 8. Text Name, City, State |
| 7. Bumper sticker on family van says "My child is an honor student at Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters" | 7. Text Name, City, State |
| 6. No tools in garage, but all the hedges are exquisitely trimmed | 6. Text Name, City, State |
| 5. When you ask to borrow a cup of sugar, her eyes turn milky white and it gets really windy | 5. Text Name, City, State |
| 4. He's uncontrollable and unpredictable in battle and prone to occasional berserker rage . . . No wait, that's my other neighbor, Mike Tyson | 4. Text Name, City, State |
| 3. When he fires up the barbeque, there's an overwhelming smell of burning brimstone | 3. Text Name, City, State |
| 2. Dude never runs out of ice at parties | 2. Text Name, City, State |
| 1. Yo, how many young sisters you know with white hair? | 1. Text Name, City, State |
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